Q: I love that Lomi Lomi is all about loving touch, but sometimes I get a client that confuses loving touch with sensual touch. Or has an alternate intention. Or is inappropriate in a sexual way. What can I do to when this kind of situation comes up?
In Lomi Lomi, we are taught to hold sacred space for healing. In my 10 years of teaching this healing art form I’ve heard all kinds of stories:
Turning around to find a client on the table that uncovered/exposed themselves while the therapist’s back was turned
Lomi-ing the hand and having someone grab on to their hand
Clients saying things that are suggestive…and worse!
In the entire time that I’ve been doing bodywork and especially since I’ve been doing Lomi, that has never happened on my table.
Number one…because I’ve been very clear with my intention and the energy that I’m bringing into that space. Number two….because I use my own intuitive knowing and gut instinct to read situations even from the time that the client calls to make an appointment.
For me, sacred space is the sweet spot. I’m an advocate for healing energies to come through from spirit to the client. That’s the only reason I’m in the room.
I have a word-for-word script that you can use to set the intention for your healing spaces. Get it FREE with the link at the bottom of this post.
When I met Justin, who I would later marry, we met in several circles casually but never really talked. One day he called, asking for a massage.
Set the Intention
I thought that he was really handsome, but I also knew that if he’s asking me for Lomi I have to set the intention. My role is not to massage him as someone who thinks that he’s attractive. I must be the one holding a sacred space of healing for him. See the difference?
When he arrived for his session, there was this unspoken energy between us. I needed to eliminate the idea of “something more” happening in the room.
I said, ”I just want to let you know that I’m here to hold space of healing for you as a professional. That’s what my intention is for our time together”. (You wouldn’t necessarily say this in your work, but I’m just sharing a personal example.)
Later, he told me how much he appreciated me taking the initiative to create a healing space.
When we went into the session, I wasn’t thinking, “Oh my gosh, I’m massaging this cute guy!”
For me, it was just as if I was massaging my auntie, uncle, sister, brother. We were able to connect on a soul level like family, instead of 2 people that could potentially be attracted to each other.
In fact, every time I massage my husband, the only thing that we do on my massage table is Lomi.
There is no crossover there for me, because I don’t want that energy to be left over for the next person who comes in. Someone who is sensitive to subtle energies could get the wrong idea.
I believe when I’m clear with my intention, I eliminate the possibilities for lower level energies.
In regards to reading the energies ahead of time to avoid any confusion, I set an intention for ONLY appropriate guests who match my energetic to find their way to my table.
Make Time to Listen
Next, I listen very carefully to my na’auao, intuitive gut instinct.
Some comments that have activated my na’auao:
- “Do you have evening sessions and can I request a female therapist?”
- “Excessive draping gets in my way and I prefer to feel free. Do I need to use draping at your facility?”
In my experience, people who ask these types of questions are generally looking for something other than loving touch.
Here are some other strategies I personally use:
- Clearly state the latest session ends at 6pm. This alone deters many clients looking for sensual touch.
- Let clients know that we use professional draping standards ensuring maximum coverage in discreet areas of the body.
- Never send a therapists out on an outcall alone after dark. If they are doing an outcall at any hour, I have them call in to the front desk while they are with the client.
“I’ve arrived at Mr. Smith’s room, number 555. I’ll call in an hour when the session is finished.”
These responses generally shift the energy. Either the client rises to meet the higher vibration of professional loving touch or they simply choose to search elsewhere.
You too, can use intention to create a sacred space for yourself and for others. In my FREE guide, 10 Practices to Ignite, Maintain and Reclaim Your Personal Power I offer a specific, word-for-word mantra. Use it daily and between clients to develop a zone of nurturing, healing and light.